I've never been a big fan of Eric Zorn. I always thought the dude was a bleeding-heart liberal and an annoying Cubbie fan. But I gained a lot of respect for him in 2005 when he wrote this column calling out Lord Voldemort for flip-flopping and generally being full of crap in his coverage of the World Series champion White Sox of that year.
Fortunately, Voldemort is long gone now, fired from his job at the Sun-Times. He's no longer relevant in Chicago, and the city is a better place for it.
Still, we've heard our fair share of anti-Blackhawks babble over the course of the season. We've had our fair share of anti-Blackhawks trolling right here on this blog.
On this joyous day in Chicago, as over 2 million converged downtown to celebrate a Stanley Cup championship, I thought it would be fitting to take a trip down memory lane and recall some of the classic trolls we've received about the Blackhawks here over the last 12 months. We'll begin way back on July 1, 2009, the first day of NHL free agency:
On July 1, a Blackhawks-hating troll wrote: "Marian Hossa was way overpaid for his service, and for what, to steal a player from a hated rival. The Red Wings are tickled pink today. This is a player that was soft in the entire playoffs, and really did nothing when it mattered. It was like that in Pittsburgh last year too. He is not a playoff player. Sure he can do good things in the regular season, but so what. Players are defined with what they do in the postseason."
On July 24, a Blackhawks-hating troll wrote: "Our guy Marian Hossa is going to be out for several months after a shoulder surgery. For all intents and purposes, his first year as a Blackhawk will be nonexistent. Yeah he can go play in the final three months of the season, but how effective can he be? It's hard for an athlete to just play well all of a sudden after an injury. It does not work that way. The Red Wings are the best organization in sports, and rarely, they never make mistakes so they clearly knew what they were doing with Hossa.
"My shoulder is strong enough to hold up this 35-pound Cup. The Red Wings might have been 'tickled pink' back in July, but they made a HUGE mistake in letting me go to a division rival. My first year as a Blackhawk was hardly 'nonexistent.' In fact, I'm a Stanley Cup champion."
On July 3, a Blackhawks-hating troll wrote: "The Devils have been letting players go left and right. I thought they did the right thing letting Madden walk. He hasn't done much since he won the Selke Trophy years ago, and he gets burned often on defense. He has played like his age in recent years, and former Devils coach Brent Sutter never had any use for him so it said something about his ability to play. The 5 Devils fans I know here will not miss him."
"Getting the hell out of that swamp and coming to a great city like Chicago and a great organization like the Blackhawks reinvigorated my career. I've got three Stanley Cups to my credit now. I haven't forgotten how to play this game."
On May 30, a Blackhawks-hating troll wrote: "Sorry, but screening a goaltender and playing dirty is not something to be admired. I like to think a player is good based on sheer talent. Being an agitator is nothing to be proud of."
"You know what is to be admired? This beautiful silver Cup I'm holding. I helped win it by screening goaltenders and doing all the dirty work in the corners and in front of the net. Every championship team needs a guy like me."
On April 16, a Blackhawks-hating troll said: "Nemmi (sic) did not look great IMO. I thought he showed his true colors, and that's why I don't see him leading his team to the Cup. Odds are he will lead his team in a first round exit tomorrow."
On March 27, a Blackhawks-hating troll said: "This is exactly why I don't take Da Hawks seriously for the Stanley Cup. You need great goaltending to win in the playoffs. Last year, Khabibulin gave it to them. Of course, he has a track record of playing great in the playoffs. Can't say the same for Huet. Who know about Niemi? He sure doesn't strike fear on anyone. I like Washington to win the Cup. At least, they have goaltending and better defense. But keep dreaming about the team being a Stanley Cup. You sure talk in rose-colored glasses, JB."
For those who don't speak Finnish, "pure minua" means "bite me."
JB says: I could go on, so I will. Marty "Havalat" may have a good track record of scoring in the playoffs, but that did the Minnesota Wild no good when they finished in 13th place in the West.
I hear Dale Tallon never should have been hired as Blackhawks GM. It's a good thing he was, since he drafted players like Jonathan Toews, Patrick Kane and the unheralded Niklas Hjalmarsson. He also traded for Patrick Sharp, Andrew Ladd, Kris Versteeg and Ben Eager. Oh, and he signed Brian Campbell, Marian Hossa, Tomas Kopecky, John Madden, Brent Sopel, and yes, Antti Niemi in free agency. Most of these Stanley Cup-winning players were acquired by Tallon. That's a fact.
On January 31, a Blackhawks-hating troll said: "The NHL would never be the same if the Wings are not there. The Wings are the flagship franchise of the NHL. When people think about the NHL, they think about the Red Wings."
Not anymore. The Red Wings are long gone, defeated in the second round by a San Jose Sharks team the Blackhawks swept in the Western Conference finals. The Stanley Cup resides in "Sweet Home Chicago," and we are going to celebrate this all summer long!
Thanks for the shoutout, JB.
If only Da Bears, Da Sux, Da Cubs, Da Bulls and I-L-L-I-N-i were as goos as Da Hawks.
I might be wrong on Da Hawks, but hard to believe Da Sux, Da Cubs, Da Bulls and I-L-L-I-N-i will prove me wrong.
Tell you what. If the White Sox win the division (BWHAHAHAHHAHAHA!) this year, I will go visit Chicago for a game next year.
I don't see Da Sux winning a championship for a very long time. I think the Twins have a monopoly of the AL Central for years to come.
I don't see Da Cubs winning a championship as long as I am alive.
I don't expect Da Bears to win a Super Bowl in my lifetime.
Michael, Scottie, Phil ain't coming back. LeBron is not coming to Chicago.
I-L-L-I-N-I might as well go play in Division I-AA.
Congrats to Da Hawks. Fortunately, the rest of the Chicago sports teams suck.
Geez, your spelling sucks. Maybe one day you'll be "as goos as Da Hawks" too.
I have nothing to worry about. I've seen plenty of championships in my lifetime:
Bears Super Bowl? Check.
Bulls win NBA title? Check, six times over.
White Sox win World Series? Check.
Blackhawks win Stanley Cup? Check.
The Cubs? I don't care what they do.
If I die tomorrow, I'll die happy.
Who the hell cares about the past?
Only losers talk about the past. Even then, those teams should have won more.
I worry about the present.
The Blackhawks will be good for a long time.
What about the rest of the Chicago sports teams?
The White Sox had one championship ever. One under the Jerry Reinsdorf era. In this market, it should be unacceptable. They should have won more than one championship, and they should be a playoff fixture every single year in this decade. Sorry, that's not success no matter what you think. They shouldn't be looking up to the Twins every year when you look at their payroll and their talent. That does not fly with me. That franchise has been a failure. Losing to the Twins every year is nothing to be proud of.
The Cubs have gone 102 years, and it's going to 103 this year. There's nothing to be proud of. They play in Chicago so I will mention them, not to mention I hate them.
Da Bears have done nothing since 85. They have been terrible in the 90s. They had the fluke run like the White Sox in 06. They have not been in the playoffs since the Colts blew Da Bears out. Again, how are they successful? Da Bears should be owning the NFC North every year. There's no reason why a small-market football team should be dominating the NFC North all the time.
Da Bulls have done nothing since Michael retired. One-and-out does not make a successful season period. They have been a medicore team, and it is not going to get better as long as Prince is playing the way he is. Maybe they become a dynasty if LeBron is around, but why would he waste his career playing for Da Bulls?
Good thing you did not mention I-L-L-I-N-I. They are not in a level of Michigan, Ohio State or any elite program yet Illinois fans like to talk in that sentence, which is funny. Fortunately for I-L-L-I-N-I, Big 10 did not have much expansion or else they would win nothing again.
Only great thing in Chicago is the Hawks.
Shouldn't Chicago sports fans expect more from the rest of their teams? There's no reason why the White Sox should not be playing in October all the time along with the Cubs. Da Bears should have won a championship by now with that roster. Da Bulls should start resembling a NBA team not a cute little team. Shouldn't I-L-L-I-N-I act like a big-time program knowing they should get great athletes in the city of Chicago?
Maybe you have zero standards, but I certainly do. But then again, you defend Bruce Weber, Jay Cutler, Kenny Williams, Ozzie, Derrick Rose so it doesn't surprise me you are content with the past.
Why just settle past? Expect more or else what's the point of watching sports.
As I indicated, my life as a sports fan has been fulfilling. I have no anger, no bitterness, toward anyone.
Well, I still don't have any use for Lord Voldemort. But since he's irrelevant now, I don't need to be bitter toward him either.
BTW: Timberwolf's last message kicked into my "junk e-mail" folder. Oh, the irony....
Yet you mention to talk about me and Jay Mariotti often so you obviously have some anger in you. Hey maybe one day, another Chicago sports team can win a championship (BWAHHAAHAHAHA1) and we can have that same cutable post like this again for the four readers that read this site.
Best. Blog. Ever.
What a day for a parade! Today's ticker tape parade for the Blackhawks reminded me so much of the Sox Championship parade I attended in 2005 -- such great memories, jubilation, and excitement. Despite the heat, standing around for five hours, and the crowds in excess of TWO MILLION, I'm so glad I went downtown today and got to be a part of history. :)
Don't flatter yourself.
Of course, if I was a Minnesota fan, I'd probably be as angry and thin-skinned as you are, too. What has it been now? 19 years since a Minnesota team won a title in anything? That's too bad. You hate to see something like that happen.
During that time, Chicago has won 8 titles in three major sports leagues and the Sun-Times fired Lord Voldemort. Life is good here.
And hey, if you don't like this blog, don't read it. I still get a paycheck either way.
I love this blog.
I get to make mock you all the time, JB. In fact, I will be here throughout the summer trashing Da Sux and Da Cubs. What is there to hate?
All I know is the Twins are 8 games up on Da Sux. What is there to be upset? I would be ticked off if the 2008 AL Central Champs* were in first place or if the Twins choke this year, which is not happening thanks to Da Sux sucking.
Plus, the Gophers took I-L-L-I-N-I's postseason spot by winning a basketball game at Assembly Hall and then use it to go to the Big Ten Tournament game that helped them qualify for the tournament.
It's just too bad only four people are here to read it. Four. You should go promote this entry at WSI. I love to hear what people react.
Timberwolf,
While driving home from watching the Cup clincher with about a dozen members of my hardcore Blackhawk family, I thought of you and how you must've been hopping mad at that moment, because I was able to have the greatest night in my life seeing the team I have always loved more than any win the holy grail of sports--THE STANLEY CUP! How does that make you feel?
Oh, it's time to change up my signature:
~The Girl Who Has Seen Her Teams Win NINE Championships In Her Lifetime
(I am only a few years younger than you, yet I've been much happier with my teams...That has to sting, you retard!)
It is kind of funny to watch Timberwolf desperately try to change the subject here. None of his comments are even on topic.
Thanks for all the Red Wings fellacio and hockey "insight" throughout the season, Timberwolf.
First off all, can we please retire the Timberwolf moniker? I prefer to be called Cabbage Patch Kid. I only named myself that moniker since last summer in honor a Jay the Joke poster who nicknamed CPK based on how I looked like being a fattie with red hair.
Second of all, I took a shot at the rest of the Chicago sports teams. You celebrated the Hawks, which is fine. The point I am making is talk to me when Chicago sports teams have a run like Boston sports teams, who win championships in recent years. The Red Sox, Bruins, Celtics and the Patriots always position themselves to win it all every year. When Chicago sports teams do it at the same time, I will really be impressed. The fact Da Hawks won it all does not make me happy, but I am not going to kill myself either. After all, it's only hockey.
Celebrate Da Hawks all you want, but it does not mean the rest of Chicago sports teams are going to stop sucking. Point I am making I still enjoy the fact the other Chicago sports teams still suck.
Somehow, I am not going to worry about the 2008 AL Central Champs* making a "run" in the AL Central this year. The Twins have that in the bag. Only thing going for Da Sux is last place.
I will celebrate the Hawks all I want. I'm enjoying every minute of it.
Fine. Who told you not to celebrate?
I never said you not to celebrate.
Just realize the Hawks are the best that town got because the rest stink. I don't see the White Sox winning anymore for the next 15 years with the Twins owning the division with an imperssive young talent on that roster. I don't see the Cubs winning a championship in my lifetime. As long as the Vikings and the Packers exist, Da Bears will do anything. LeBron is not going to be a Bull. Illinois might as well join Division I-AA in college sports along with Northwestern with the Big 10 expansion.
In that regards, I have it good. When Chicago has that great run Boston has now, I will be impressed.
Fine. Who told you not to celebrate?
I never said you not to celebrate.
Just realize the Hawks are the best that town got because the rest stink. I don't see the White Sox winning anymore for the next 15 years with the Twins owning the division with an impressive young talent on that roster. I don't see the Cubs winning a championship in my lifetime. As long as the Vikings and the Packers exist, Da Bears will not do anything. LeBron is not going to be a Bull. Illinois might as well join Division I-AA in college sports along with Northwestern with the Big 10 expansion.
In that regards, I have it good. When Chicago has that great run Boston has now, I will be impressed.
You have it good in what regard? 19 years of no championships in anything?
(Snip)
I warned you about off-topic posts.
How about you just ban me from posting, but of course, you won't have any courage?
Why would I ban you from posting? My co-workers and I enjoy the comic relief you provide.
The problem is you've sent me basically the same exact tirade eight times in the last 22 hours. Yes, I counted. You keep hammering because you seem to think I'm missing your point. The reality is I simply don't care.
If you care to post something that's actually on topic, or different from the usual crud you send in, I'll be glad to approve it. But you're just trolling right now, and I have a newspaper to put out.
TIMBERWOLF,
Chicago is the only city to have won championships in all 4 leagues since I was born.
Oh, and I have now seen my teams win titles NINE times in my lifetime!
Put THAT in the hash pipe you smoke daily, you ****tard!!!
Timberwolf is just doing what losers do here. He's getting owned in this argument, and he's desperately trying to change the subject.
Unfortunately, this blog entry is not about the White Sox. It's not about the Cubs, Bears, Bulls or Illini either. Nor is it about what Boston sports teams have done over the last few years.
This blog entry is about how Timberwolf assured us all year long that the Blackhawks were destined to fail. They did not fail. They won the Stanley Cup. And we'll keep that in mind next time Timberwolf claims he is "providing insight" or "setting the record straight" on this blog. No, he's just trolling, and that's all he's doing. Now, he's being held accountable for his statements, and he's trying to change the subject. A classic loser tactic.
And, oh, we're keeping the Timberwolf moniker alive here. The Timberwolves finished 15-67 this past year. That's a terrible .183 winning percentage. I think that moniker fits our resident troll quite nicely.
Timberwolf is such a waste of humanity. Much to his chagrin, the Hawks won the Stanley Cup and he's just going to have to deal with that. Get over yourself, dude. That is all.
Heather: You go think about the past. There's nothing worse than someone thinking about the past. That's like Al Bundy thinking about his great days as a quarterback at Polk High School. For all the good thing he did, he become a shoe salesman in the end.
JB: No, this blog was about rubbing it in to me so I responded accordingly mocking about the rest of the Chicago sports teams. BTW, I see White Sox fans are giddy now at WSI because they gained two games in the standings. Again, get to .500, and we'll talk. Plus, the White Sox have to deal with the Tigers along with the Twins in that division.
Timbertroll, we have no need to go think about the past because we have a championship to celebrate right here in the present.
The greatest trophy in all of sports, the Stanley Cup, now resides in the greatest sports city of them all. Sweet Home Chicago!
It's going to be a great summer!
Indeed, it will be a great summer, JB.
The Twins will run away in the AL Central while the 2008 AL Central Champs* and Da Cubs continue to self-implode in their quest for last place.
I was just thinking the other day about my favorite all-time Timberwolf trolls. I'd have to go back to the first night of the Stanley Cup playoffs, when Nashville scratched out a win at the United Center.
Not five minutes after the game ended, Timberwolf was on here trolling, thinking he was going to taunt someone, desperately trying to rub salt in a wound that didn't even exist. Go about seven comments down here:
http://blogs.suburbanchicagonews.com/bauman/2010/04/round_one_hawks_vs_predators.html#comments
Timberwolf got laughed right outta here.
"That empty-netter was a thing of beauty!"
That's rich. You can't make this stuff up. Michael Lush and I still joke about that empty-netter comment.
Predators in six!
Perhaps CabbagePatchKid will literally become one.
Thanks for stopping by, tstrike.
Is this you, Joey Schuler?
I told you I can flat out recruit. I told hime come here, and voila.
I need some new blood to argue. Arguing with the same people gets real old. I am hoping MarySwiss comes here. I want to argue with that old woman and put in her place.
Sorry, Timberwolf, but I've met tstrike personally before. In fact, I know he's been reading for awhile. He's just never commented. Unless he has changed his name, he is not Joey Schuler.
Sorry, Timberwolf, not Joey Schuler. I'm the one that's met Jason, he does good work, both here and wsi. To be honest, it sounds like someone's either got WAY too much time on their hands to troll, heckle, and try to recruit fellow hecklers, or they're just plain disturbed and need to seek help. I'm very much thinking the latter of the two.
I wanted to commment because through all the Blackhawks articles, they were very well done, as is the blog itself.v
Anybody know who the hell Joey Schuler is? I can't say that I know the guy...
I am surprised the Mayor of the Valley of the Stupid aka whitesox901 hasn't popped up here.