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Elgin's Biggest Loser: Week One, Day One frustrations

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janelle.jpgNOTE: Courier-News freelancer Janelle Walker has signed up for the second round of the "Elgin's Biggest Loser" challenge. Participants weigh in Wednesday nights, and Janelle is blogging the experience exclusively for The Courier-News.

I hate "diet plans." They make no sense and don't tell me what I want to know in five minutes or less. I need bullet points and lists, not prose.

I've bought diet books before, including The Zone and the Atkins books. And they bored me to tears. Which is why I probably couldn't stick to them. They don't tell a single woman with a busy schedule how to do this without wasting my time. Sitting and reading your flowery prose means I am not walking or on the Gazelle or heading over to the Y for a workout.

I don't care about reading about the science behind your particular plan. I know. I have heard from people who've had success and the diet works. I don't want to know about your personal history and challenges. I have my own, thank you very much. Just like I delete most "inspirational" e-mail forwards, I will ignore your "inspirational" story.

More frustrations, after the jump.

Just tell me what to do. Give me a list of "go to the store and go buy this now." Then, give me a list of things to make for breakfast and lunch that can be done in five minutes. If you give me a recipe for my lunch, I will hit you over the head with it. Who has time to cook lunch? The night before? I am busy making the dinner, for Pete's sake.

So I am going through the website of a popular low-carb plan today and yelling at the screen. Not helpful! Not made for people who think like me at all.

So, instead of getting on the Gazelle and getting my workout in, I am on the computer trying to figure out how to do this darn diet. This is not going well.

-- Janelle Walker, Freelance Writer

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O.K. No more inspirational messages!
Let's get tough!
Work your butt off...don't stop until you sweat, sweat, sweat!
Follow that healthy diet...only you can pay for "slip-ups"
No excuses...
Do what you want, only you can fail!
(but, I'll still use you as my inspiration) :-D

Nice post, found your blog the other day on Yahoo you seem to talk a lot of sense!

Hi there.
I have a question for you... What the heck are you talking about?
You want someone to tell you exactly what to eat? Then go to a Registered Dietician like I do. You want to know exactly what to do for exercise? Then hire a personal trainer like I do. No time to cook? Then have your food delivered.
For crying out loud, just stop complaining and making excuses !!
( ...and I'm not kidding here ).
Do you suppose that it's important to get healthy and live a few extra years? ... then stop looking for "diet plans" and short cuts, and start educating yourself and following through with what you learned. You say that you already know all the "science", and you're still looking for a "diet plan"...???? You know all the science and you're still overweight? Sounds like you need to be reeducated. Period.
So, if I can help you in any way, please let me know. You can find me on or That said, please know that I'm not a professional in any of the above, and unless you've got certifications in nutrition or exercise, I suppose it's time to start asking for help from those whose career is to do just that. Deal??

How's this for simple? (I hear your pain!)

A diet that can be explained in six words.

It's called the Six Word Diet, and I invented it and lost 75 pounds on it in half a year. LITERALLY to a size zero from sizes 16 and 18 up to 20-something.

Here's the diet: Eat 100 calories every 90 minutes. Only time you don't eat is when you're sleeping.

That is IT.

And 100 calories of what? ANYTHING. We suggest healthy food, but for purposes of weight loss, it does NOT matter WHAT you eat, as long as you eat only 100 calories of it every 90 minutes.

To pack lunch, just take a bag and throw in an apple, a carton of milk, some bags of 100-calorie goldfish crackers, a bag of 100-calorie cranberries, 100-calorie popcorn, ANYTHING, even trash food works, tho again, it's not good for you, but as far as losing weight--THERE ARE NO RULES besides the six words.

Google six word diet dot com or go to six word diet at blogspot dot com. I don't update often because, come on, with a diet of just six words, what is there to talk about? You're eating every 90 minutes. It's incredible.

I have a booklet you can get, but you don't need it if you have the savvy, which obviously you do, to read the side of products and figure out how much of it you can eat for 100 calories. The booklet has a giant index listing almost every food and how much of it you can eat at each mini-meal, but again, save your money. It's not that hard.

There you go. No emo stories. No fill up a book so we can make a buck bullcrud. Just HOW TO LOSE THE DANG WEIGHT WHEN YOU ARE DESPERATE.

If you try this and it works--and believe me, it will--please let me know!

*I guess I should be legally careful and disclaim: I am not a dietician, so don't do anything without your doctor's approval.

Beth Drennan
Six Word Diet

Good post, thanks

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About this Entry

This page contains a single entry by Emily McFarlan published on June 3, 2010 12:19 PM.

Elgin's Biggest Loser: Week One was the previous entry in this blog.

Brew Reviews: Marmaduke, Splice, Killers, Get Him to the Greek, Ondine is the next entry in this blog.

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