NOTE: In a revival of this "classic" Friday feature, Courier-News reporter Mike Danahey guesses how much beer (or other beverage of choice) it might take him to pay money to see a recently-released movie. His opinions are based on trailers, ads and advance hype.
Here are some of the movies playing this weekend...
We Bought a Zoo
Oh, no, you didn't. Who the heck would buy a zoo? Really small zoos are just depressing roadside attractions. But this is a Cameron Crowe film, and he so wants to be Frank Capra, you just know this will be a sweet, gooey mess.
Beer rating: A lot of Hamm's, the beer of bears.
The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, War Horse, after the jump.
The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo
A couple friends of mine posited the essential question about this movie: Why was it made in the first place? The first version is only three years old. Sure, it's in Swedish, but it really wasn't that hard to follow. This one has Daniel Craig not even attempting an accent, but pretty much everyone else does.
Beer rating: Lots of Carlsberg. I know -- that's Danish. But they own the biggest plant in Sweden, too.
Even though the bit was about the play based on the same material, the SNL skit pretty much about War Horse pretty much ruined it for me. The best quips I read about it called this the best picture of the year, the year being 1942, while another called it "Saving Private Ryan" meets "The Black Stallion." Plus, it's 150 minutes long.
Beer rating: There's actually a War Horse Brewing Company in Seneca Lake, N.Y. Road trip?
WHAT?! You were looking for a REAL movie review? Our Sun-Times Media colleague Roger Ebert at the Chicago Sun-Times does a swell job at that.
-- Mike Danahey, Staff Writer