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Memo to my waitress... - Get Off My Lawn

Memo to my waitress...

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It's a Friday night. You work in a restaurant. I know your job is stressful right now and that you're very busy.

I don't care that the hostess hates you. It doesn't matter to me that the cooks won't tell you when your food is up.

I don't care about any of that -- Really, I don't.

Just please go get my Caesar salad.

Signed,
The hungry fat man who has spent years working in restaurants and will pretend like he cares about you because he's a kind man, but deep down inside, he wishes you'll just go away.

PS -- You forgot to charge us for the second round of beers.

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5 Comments

If the hungry fat man was truly a kind man like he claims to be, he wouldn't wish the waitress to go away. In fact, the waitress is being kind by not charging you for beers. Maybe she wishes you would just go away. She wouldn't be alone.

You really want us to believe all you had for dinner on Friday night was a Caesar salad?

Maybe you know me too well, mommak. Unfortunately, though, the salad was only the beginning of the meal.

Peter Gozinia wrote:
Maybe she wishes you would just go away. She wouldn't be alone.
Sadly, Peter, I'm here to stay. But, thanks for hoping.

Actually Peter, you may be alone, I know many people who would like to see Patrick stay around for a long, long time.
That being being said, you were a little harsh on the waitress Patrick......

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Patrick Ferrell

Patrick Ferrell, is a staff reporter for The Herald News in Joliet. and the Sun Times News Group. Patrick covers education and politics. When he’s not ranting about something, Patrick can usually be found watching a race or careening down a ski slope. He resides in Will County with his wife, Laura, and the couple’s Portuguese water dog, Oscar, and bloodhound named Duke.

About this Entry

This page contains a single entry by Patrick Ferrell published on May 23, 2008 7:30 AM.

The new guns versus butter debate: carrots vs. cupcakes... was the previous entry in this blog.

What can I do to put you into this car today? is the next entry in this blog.

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