What's Pooh with you?

Dear Zapped,

It’s even worse than we thought.

Now those wily Chinese are training our children to lick toilets and using Winnie the Pooh to do it..

The Consumer Product Safety Commission recalled 160,000 Chinese-made potty-training seats this week due to possible excessive lead content in a paint used for the product. We closely examined the objects and, to Swami's tired but wise old eyes, the only way to get the lead into a child’s mouth is for the child to lean over and lick the seat.

If that’s true, we’re having a worse issue with our children than we thought.

There’s no documentation in the CPSC announcement but we wonder how they did research to prove this is happening. Did somebody actually see a kid licking the Tigger and Winnie the Pooh plaques on the toilet? (Ooh, how foul those Chinese are to lure our children with lead-laced Tigger toilet accoutrements. And further, so THAT's how Winnie got his nickname.)

Researcher: “Yes, Little Larry, lean over just a smidgen more and run your tongue along the Winnie the Pooh edge of the toilet seat. Oooh, yummy. Little Larry is such a good boy.”

It might be true that Little Larry added to the body of scientific knowledge regarding this topic, but to what result? Is he doomed to a life of odd compulsions and disturbing attractions? Does he turn out to be the next Larry Craig?

Will his life be permanently stalled? (Insert robust Boo! here)

Swami admits this is a long parabolic orbit merely so we can do a Larry Craig joke, but, hey, you work with the material at hand.

We also wonder if it's officially OK to lick the toilet seat if it wasn't made in China?

Here’s the official CPSC announcement.

Make your own joke if you have a better one.

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission, in cooperation with the firm named below, today announced a voluntary recall of the following consumer product. Consumers should stop using recalled products immediately unless otherwise instructed.
Name of Product: The First Years 3-in-1 Flush and Sounds Potty Seats
Units: About 160,000
Importer/Distributor: RC2 Corp., of Oak Brook, Ill.
Hazard: Decorative plaque inserted into the back of the potty seat could have orange paint that contains excessive levels of lead, violating the federal lead paint standard.
Incidents/Injuries: None reported.
Description: The recall involves the First Years 3-in-1 Flush and Sounds potty training seats. Each seat has either a yellow chair with a green removable seat and a purple lift out-pot or a blue chair with a white removable seat and green lift out-pot. The words "100 Acre Wood" are molded on the chair back. The plaque inserted into the back of the seat contains molded Winnie the Pooh and Tigger characters.
Manufactured in: China
Sold at: Mass and specialty retailers nationwide from April 2006 through August 2007 for between $20 and $25.
Remedy: Consumers should keep these recalled items away from young children and should contact RC2 to receive a permanent clear protective cover that covers the plaque. The unit can still be used as a potty seat.
Consumer Contact: For additional information, contact RC2 toll-free at (866) 725-4407 between 8 a.m. and 5 p.m. CT Monday through Friday or visit the firm’s Web site at www.recalls.rc2.com