Memorial Day Weekend's news today -- only from the crystal ball of The Swami:
... Hillary Clinton, John McCain and Barack Obama will actually take a day or two off from the warpath, knowing that no one with a life pays attention to the news on a holiday weekend anyway ...
... that bag of charcoal briquettes that you left in the garage to freeze and thaw all winter will not light no matter what you put on it at the family barbecue -- and, yes, this would include gasoline ...
... motorists who bite the bullet and fill up their tanks at $75 a pop to travel north to Wisconsin or south to Michi-ana will be amazed at how open the roads are, since everyone else will be staying home and saving up for Tuesday's trip to work ...
... that roaring sound you will hear around 10 a.m. Monday will be the wild cheering of dentists everywhere, thrilled that children at Memorial Day parades will pick up pounds of fresh candy to rot out their teeth ...
... and the mercury will finally top the 80-degree mark in Lake County on Sunday, bringing with it a humidity that will make us pine for the refreshing north winds of February.
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