Today's headline: "Metra's Phase 2 Resurfacing To Begin"
Tomorrow's headline, only from the crystal ball of The Swami: "Round Lake Man Takes 18 Hours To Drive Home Via Metra Detour"
Today's headline: "Rotten Office Fridge Cleanup Sends 7 To Hospital"
Tomorrow's headline, only from the crystal ball of The Swami: "Your Office Fridge Sees Their 7, Raises Them 8"
Today's headline: "Protesters Against Obama Swarm Notre Dame: His Appearance At University Roils Those Who Disagree With Abortion Stance"
Tomorrow's headline, only from the crystal ball of The Swami: "Obama Protestors Hope No One Asks For Their Stance On Tithing"
Today's headline: "Craigslist Dropping 'Erotic Services' Ads"
Tomorrow's headline, only from the crystal ball of The Swami: "Craigslist Goes Out Of Business"
Today's headline: "Zambrano Likely To Make Rehab Start This Weekend"
Tomorrow's headline, only from the crystal ball of The Swami: "Disgruntled Cub Fan Makes Plans To Boo Zambrano's First Walk Allowed Upon Return From DL"
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